I was looking at my boys this morning. They are so big and have come so far. The journey they have taken so far has already been epic.
My three youngest were diagnosed as babies. 8 months. 2 years. 5 years. They needed so much help for years…we did E.V.E.R.Y.T.H.I.N.G. for them.
But now…NOW…things are different. They check their own sugars when they wake up. They often make their own breakfast, they count their own carbs…they bolus themselves. Even my 6 year old knows how many carbs are in a bowl of cereal, or a piece of toast, or his favorite, Eggo's. He knows if he has milk with his Eggo's he needs to use the little glass, and then add 10 more carbs. And if he forgets, my 12 year old is there to remind him. CRAY-Z!
It is so surreal.
They still totally need me of course…but life is so much easier now. Easier…not easy, but hell, it is a cake walk compared to when they were babies.
I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again…those years were all a blur to me. I didn’t blog then, so my fuzzy memory is like an old broken down TV giving short grainy flashes of what was. The worry was deafening. I couldn’t focus on much more than their care. My husband was working 15 hour days then. Our marriage was strong…but only existed in two hour increments here and there. Sleep was a rare luxury. It is all there in my memory, but a distant echo of what was.
I’m glad I don’t relive it every day. I’m glad I have almost forgotten the archaic insulin my 8 month old was on…and the insane expectations that came with it. But lately, the babies have been on my mind.
Not my babies…those in our blogging community. I read their blogs and it breaks my heart. I know about the erratic blood sugar numbers that sometimes seem IMPOSSIBLE to fix. I know about the effect it has on their little personalities. I know their story. It is the same as mine.
So today I just wanted to send some love out to the babies and their parents. And I want to tell them that someday…someday soon, but not soon enough…it will be easier. You will soon share the responsibility with your baby. And your baby will surprise you at every corner with their bravery, their strength, their perspective and wit.
Your baby will amaze you. As my babies have today.
They will count carbs. They will give their own insulin. They will share the responsibility and it will make a huge difference in your life. You won’t be in it alone anymore…you’ll be in it together.
And together my friends, makes all the difference.